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07 March 2010 @ 10:01 pm
The bike path over at the Scafadees is lava. And if you touch it you’re dead...  
So sayeth Patton Oswalt...

Remember when you were a little kid, and your friends be out playing a game, like, cowboys and Indians, or fort, some game where there was like fake boundaries?

So they would say, “Okay! Uh, the bike path over at the Scafadees is lava. And if you touch it you’re dead. And then the hedges over at the Swingerlands are poison snakes and if go over there they’ll bite you, and you’re dead.”

And those are the boundaries. But you weren’t there when they started playing. You show up an hour later because you were going to the pool. You were all, “Hey guys, I’m gonna go to the pool.”

“Hey, don’t touch the bike path! It’s lava!! Don’t!! The! Hedges are snakes!”

“Oh, I’m not. I wasn’t here when you did all that. I’m just going to the pool. I doesn’t affect me.”

Jokes.com
Patton Oswalt - Fake Boundaries
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Know what I’m talking about? Well, that’s pretty much how I treat the pot laws in this country.